Abodebound

Okay. You're giving everyone one last chance to date you before you do something drastic.
You aren't sure what yet, but you're sure you'll figure it out if it comes to that.

This time, you should choose more carefully, and court someone you think has any chance of saying yes.

..Or, you can choose the friend who gets the most bitches of anyone you know and hope for the best.

You choose the latter option.

-- tacentArmlet [TA] began trolling abdominalTerror [AT] --
TA: I HAVE A PROPOSITION FOR YOU. IT'S OF 6REAT IMPORTANCE.
TA: I PROMISE IT'LL BE WORTH YOUR WHILE.
AT: 0kay, just mak3 sur3 it's quick. i d0n't hav3 all night.
TA: I AM IN NEED OF SOMEONE TO DATE.
AT: and?
TA: I'M HAPPY TO FILL ANY 6AP IN YOUR QUADRANTS FOR YOU.
TA: I'M JUST DESPERATE.
AT: w3 all kn0w, trust m3.
AT: and as much as i'd l0v3 an0th3r highbl00d in my r0st3r, my quadrants ar3 full.
AT: w3ll, 3xc3pt f0r ash3n, i gu3ss. but i'd rath3r n0t hav3 s0m30n3 3ls3 m3ddling in my r3lati0nships.
AT: tt is pl3nty.
TA: OKAY, WELL MALMOK'S A DWEEB.
TA: I'D MAKE A MUCH BETTER MOIRAIL THAN HIM.
TA: YOU COULD EASILY UP6RADE FROM HIM TO ME. JUST SAYIN6.
AT: y0u mak3 a g00d p0int...
AT: but i n33d m0r3 than 0bvi0us stat3m3nts.
TA: I'LL PAY TO UP6RADE YOUR 6RUBTECH.
TA: WHENEVER YOU WANT, TOO.
AT: y0u hav3 g0t y0urs3lf a d3al.
AT: i'll cut things 0ff with malm0k at s0m3 p0int s00nish.
AT: wh3n3v3r i g3t ar0und t0 it.
TA: HOLY SHIT IT WORKED!!!
TA: IT ACTUALLY WORKED!!
TA: THANK YOU ARATAN, YOU BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL BOY!!!!!!
AT: d0n't mak3 m3 r3gr3t this alr3ady.
TA: I WON'T!
TA: SORRY.
TA: JUST 60T EXCITED IS ALL.
AT: y3ah, w3ll, c00l it, will y0u?
AT: anyway, i've gtg. grubclub m33ting. y0u kn0w h0w it is.
TA: OF COURSE! I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER THEN.
TA: OR TOMORROW! OR WHENEVER YOU WANT.
-- abdominalTerror [AT] ceasted trolling tacentArmlet [TA] --

NEVER KILL YOURSELF!!!!!!

Ahem.
Not that you intended to. It was just the first thing you thought to say in your excitement. You sincerely apologise for this unsightly behaviour.

But, gog, this is the first time you've dated anyone since... like, a sweep ago! You are so ecstatic that you don't know what to do with yourself. Brag to everyone? Rub it in Malmok and Regulo's faces?

You end up punching a few more holes in your respiteblock walls.